what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Randomize
