It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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