if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i think my mom watched the whole time
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize