Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Randomize
