I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
