I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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