to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
