He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
