Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
3 2 1 whiskey
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
