All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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