I wanna passion pit in your ass
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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