I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
