Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
