Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
