I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
