Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
