all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
