This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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