Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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