dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
