I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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