I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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