Don't you send me to vm
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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