after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
