Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
