Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
