you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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