I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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