never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Randomize
