There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
