Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
