You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Randomize
