i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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