i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Randomize