First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
