we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize