"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
