In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
