I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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