My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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