still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
