Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
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