At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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