I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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