bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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