I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Randomize
