Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
