too bad you live with your parents still
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
