i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
