wat bout pragnant strippers??
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
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