It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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