this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize