p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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