whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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